


Roses are Blue

by tukimecca



Category: World Trigger
Genre: Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-13
Updated: 2015-12-13
Packaged: 2018-05-06 11:13:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5414690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tukimecca/pseuds/tukimecca
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Miwa probably knew since they were a lot younger than now that Jin would never stay by his side.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Roses are Blue

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: in which they knew each other when they were a little. It’s just JinMiwa really fit the whole ‘never meant to be’ thing, and if we go by canon, getting them happy together is just as hard as making Jin stopped eating bonchiage. Reposting from my Tumblr.

When Miwa met Jin for the first time, he was eight and Jin was ten. But Jin was older, not just 2 years older, but a lot more older. When he smiled, the corner of his eyes crinkled, it was genuine, but he looked tired. Despite the mirth that Miwa often found dancing his eyes, there was a lot more of wisdom and prudence.

Jin is not, by any means, prim and proper. He’s carefree, outgoing and outspoken. Then sometimes, there would be a refrained smile; he pulled his lips back a little less wider than usual, his vocabulary would be too extensive for young and little Miwa to understand, his back would straighten more than usual. Adult praised him for his maturity and Jin would smile, smile that never quiet reach his eyes, and Miwa thought even compared to the adult around him, Jin still looked older.

Miwa was a year older, and was scrapping the drying scar on his knee when eleven years old Jin told him, “I can see the future you know.”

The smaller boy whipped his head to see the elder, mouth hanging open in wonder and big, owlish eyes blinking rapidly.

Jin grinned and pinched his cheek, saying something like ‘cute’. Miwa swatted his hands away, pouting.

“What do you mean you can see the future? How come? How, how does it feel?” Miwa was nine and he was curious. Jin had taken up to giving him books to read in his spare time and his parent supplied him more after seeing him lying on his back, reading the fourth volume of Harry Potter with the other volumes scattered around him. 

Miwa was a very curious child who wouldn’t stop asking who, why, how, what, where, and when. Jin was the one who often took his hand and show him the way.He would smuggle Miwa out to stargaze when summer rolled around. Miwa remembered looking up at the vast expanse of milky way, and he also remembered the warmth of Jin’s arms around him, and the weigh of his chin on his head.

Jin did not scratch the back of his head when he’s nervous (like the books always said. Instead, he would glance to his right, eyes a little downcast. Miwa waited patiently for Jin’s answer, inching closer to him until their shoulder bumps while peering up at him.

The elder boy laughed, ruffling his hair and replied, “It just…happened.”

Miwa wondered how does it feel to see the future but the way Jin smiled at him and the way Jin squeezed Miwa’s elbows a little tighter than usual told him that Jin wouldn’t want him to ask. So Miwa shut his mouth and smiles encouragingly. That’s as much as he could do for Jin who had done so much for him.

-

Season rolled around. It was not winter yet when Jin, still eleven but looked way older with his solemn smile and hooded eyes curl his hand around Miwa’s smaller ones. He muttered, “I’m moving.”

Miwa felt sudden cold but the grip around his hand tighten. His eyes were watering already and he falters as he asked, peering up at Jin, “When?’

Jin’s smile was lonely but Miwa thought he had never looked as lonely as then.

If Miwa was a little older, if he was a little more observant, a little more perceptive, he would have noticed red rimming Jin’s eyes. But Miwa was nine, he was young, and he was scared at the thought of Jin leaving him to notice.

“Soon,” Miwa tugged on his hand, Jin leaned closer to him. “Soon.”

-

Jin disappeared when temperature dropped below zero, two days before the first snow of the year fall. His fingers were wrapped around a mug of hot chocolate but Miwa didn’t feel the warmth.

Jin had always appeared by his door, ears and nose red from cold with scarf messily wrapped around his shoulder, gloved hand carrying a small snow bunny when the first snow of the year fall. But when Miwa opened his door this morning after seeing the expanse of white from his window, he found no one.

He knew he could have wait but he suddenly he heard Jin’s voice in his head;I’m moving.

Almost five hours later, snuggling in his sister embrace and listening to her talking about how their cousin were going to come the next day to play with them, the words ‘I’m moving’ starting to become ‘I’m leaving.’

Miwa sniffed. He buried his head under his sister’s chin and willed himself not to cry.

Their cousin came the next day but Jin didn’t.

He never.

-

Jin was fifteen and Miwa was thirteen when they met again. It was a day of tragedy but Jin looked at Miwa like he was looking at star for the firs time.

Miwa was holding his sister’s limp body with dark, red, and black blossoming on her chest. The dark haired boy begged with trembling voice and equally trembling shoulders, drecnhed with unforgiving pouring rain.

The sharp cold pierced through his bone, to his marrow. But for Miwa, there’s nothing colder than Jin’s upturned hand, and Jin’s smiling face, and Jin’s gentle eyes, and Jin’s calm voice, when he said, “Let’s go.”

Miwa looked up at him as if discovering for the first time that world is probably not round.

Jin looked down on him as if he already knew this would be happening.

-

Time passed and as much as Miwa wanted to believe the saying; time heals, he soon discovered than rather than time, it is more the person that mattered. He refused to forget, instead, he swore vengeance and decided to walk upon it, marching on with no fear.

At one point after hearing him cried so much at night, after discovering he didn’t sleep for a week strike; grieving, his parent had tried making him forget. But for him it was the same as making him forget who he is. He’d rather suffer this way with the memory and hole gaping open in his heart (like the hole opened on his sister’s chest).

His parent left Mikado.

Miwa stayed.

And so did Jin.

-

He honestly had forgotten how many times had Jin appeared on his doorway with a smile, twinkling eyes, and bonchiage in hand.

Miwa also had forgotten how many times he had scowled, closed the door for around ten seconds before opening it again and letting Jin in.

There was nothing special to do. Mostly Jin babbling about his days and Miwa listening while doing his homework or reading. They would sit opposite each other by the coffee table but some days would find Jin sitting by Miwa’s side, sometimes leaning on Miwa’s side with hair tickling the younger boy’s cheeks. Miwa tried to shrug it few times but Jin was stronger, bigger, and more stubborn so he gave up in the middle.

Topic about Border would come up as well and only then Miwa would listen attentitvely. Instead of humming randomly to indicate he’s listening, he’d ask things, eyes not leaving the book splayed open on the tabble.

Jin always answered him but whenever the talk of certain Branch came out, he didn’t.

“How does it feel to see the future?” Sometimes Miwa would ask.

Jin did no longer squeezed his elbow. Instead, He’d humm lowly, pressing his shoulder a little closer to Miwa, or, when he was sitting opposite him, he’d shift his weight to the side, before frowning with a lopsided smile.

“It’s like you’re not even living here anymore.”

He strangely found the answer believeable but it didn’t stop him from asking, “then, where do you live?”

Jin’s frown got a little deeper and for once, Miwa thought that even someone like Jin can be ‘a little lost’ sometimes as he watched the older male chewed on his bottom lips.

“You don’t know,” Miwa stated. Jin glanced at him, frown melting as he smiled helplessly. He stopped chewing his lips and threw his head back, exposing his neck when he did so.

“Sometimes I do, sometimes I do not,” he muttered. After staring at the ceiling for a while, Jin would glanced down to Miwa from the corned of his eyes and Miwa met his gaze, waiting, daring. “But now, I am here.”

He wondered how could Jin make it so easy and wished he could do the same.

Lying.

-

Jin appeared again by his doorway today but he had no bonchiage with him. He didn’t have that big, dopey grin on his face either. But he had a smile on his face, alright, just not the usual one. It was more reserved during private time, it was the one that made Miwa actually worry for the elder at times, it was the one when Jin,

“What did you see?”

Miwa didn’t get an answer because Jin is shoving him inside and kicked the door with his legs before Jin locked their lips together. The kiss was not something people would describe as ‘hungry’, it was more on ‘desperate’ end, and Jin was holding Miwa too tight that the younger wondered whether it’d leave bruise or not.

Jin’s kiss is brutal but his ‘love’ is even more so, Miwa thought as they parted, Jin holding him still as tight, sinking to his knee and taking Miwa down with him. He buried his head in the crook of Miwa’s neck, inhaling deeply with a shudder before whispering, “I’m sorry.”

Miwa’s eyes flutter shut. He didn’t return the embrace but he let his finger curl around the fabric of Jin’s sleeves which made the brown haired male held him even tighter (if such thing was even possible). “Aren’t you always?”

Jin laughed but it sounded more like a choked out sob. Miwa didn’t say anything and they stayed like that until Miwa complained about sore legs.

Jin laughed again and this time, it sounded more like a laugh.

And when almost three weeks later Jin told him he’s moving to Tamakoma, Miwa was not surprised.

It didn’t stop it from hurting anyway.

“You’re never here,” Miwa said.

Jin smiled, and Miwa realized it was the very same smile Jin showed him when he told Miwa he was going to leave. He had looked lonely back then and this time he looked just as lonely.

And this time Miwa was older, he was more observant and perceptive. But when it came to Jin, it’s like someone got his eyes covered, he’s unseeing. So he just turned and leave instead of tugging on Jin’s hand like he did years ago.

If there’s anything that remained the same, it was the way his eyes watered and the dull ache in his heart.

And the urge to ask Jin to just please, do not leave him.

-

Jin was ninteen and Miwa was seventeen. But Miwa was actually so much younger when he accepted the fact that Jin Yuuichi would never eventually stay by his side.

And Jin had been way ‘younger’ when he saw that he could never stay by Miwa’s side, no matter how much he longed to.


End file.
